Dear Bentley, From Eden

While I was cleaning upstairs, I came across this cute note.  "Dear Bentley, I am sorry I yelled at you. It is just that I get really mad sometimes.  Maybe friend, Eden.    Friends?"

She has such a sweet heart. I love this so much.

This Girl's Got Style...

Olive picks some pretty awesome outfits.  I love that this girl likes things fancy.  She prefers skirts and lots of sparkles.  :)

Standing On Her Own

Pretty much out of the blue, Karly decided that standing up all on her own was a pretty fun idea. Up until today, she always had to hold on to something.  We, of course, all made a very big deal out of it with clapping and praise so she loved that.   She's growing up!!

I guess since she turned 1 a few days ago, she decided it was time to get up and move!  I love her tiny little legs.  She's so cute.

The "Baby" Door

Every baby discovers it eventually. She now has a way to escape!

Miscellaneous January Pictures

Celebrating Our Last "1st" Birthday

It takes only a look from those pretty blue eyes, so much like her daddy’s, before I’m lost in time, remembering this past year and how quickly she has grown and changed. Passing yet another milestone, getting rid of outgrown baby clothes that all 3 of my girls wore, and only one slobbery kiss to crawl all the way down to my depths and remind me, This is it.

This is it. You are it Karly. You are the last-born baby Justice.

We knew it from the first moment we knew of you. You grew and you kicked and you formed so perfectly, and I tried to enjoy every minute of your growing, before I’d even met you, because this was the last time I'd feel a baby kick, or those tiny hiccups from within, or the pull so tightly on my skin as you rolled over. It was hard, but I appreciated it more with you Karly, because it was the last time.

It’s funny how a new baby comes into a family by storm, how those first few months feel blurry and unreal, and then, looking back, it’s hard to remember a time when there was no baby. Our family is not a complete family without you.

You are my last-born baby. You are the culmination of seven years of childbearing, a whole lifetime of longing. I always wanted to be a mommy, and now you complete my lifelong dream.

But, you see, there is a sadness you brought with you because everything I watch you do will be the last time.

Wow. My final baby just turned 1, and while we celebrate, with special significance, each milestone she achieves, I find myself silently grieving the loss of the baby stage. My joy at not being forced to face another moment of pregnancy is palpable, but the ache for an infant in my arms has already begun.

I won’t miss the crying that wakes me up earlier than any alarm. I won’t miss the pungent pile of diapers that seems to grow by the hour. I won’t miss the armfuls of diaper bags, car seat handles, and other infant necessities that must be hauled everywhere I go. I won’t miss the worry over every slight fever, misplaced choking hazard, and hazardous stairwell opening.

I won’t miss everything, but I will miss some things.

I will miss that moment, when labor ends and they place our baby onto my chest, straight from Heaven, meant for us. It's truly the most spiritual moment I've ever experienced.

I will miss the two-syllable wail that only a newborn makes.

I will miss the panting breaths and rooting lips of the hungry baby who waited five extra minutes for her tummy full of warm milk.

I will miss the smell of a freshly bathed infant head.

I will miss the indescribable softness of round baby cheeks as they nestled into my neck, cradled against my arm, and rested against my chest.

I will miss the miniature fingers that clung so desperately to one of mine.

I will miss the tiny pats from little hands clasped tightly around my back. To me they said, “I love you, Mommy,” and I whispered back, “I love you, Baby.”

I will miss the sweet arms that reached hopefully up to me, wordlessly pleading for the comfort of my embrace.

I will miss the light that filled my baby’s eyes as I stepped into her view. I was her everything, her guardian, her sunshine, her life, but not for long.

I will miss the swift searching turn of her head, as she heard my voice after a short absence.

I will miss the heart-swelling sound of spontaneous baby giggles that cannot be forced, but which I tried to cajole out of her nonetheless.

I will miss the babbling sounds that all end in “a,” but are used to describe everything in a baby’s amazing world.

I will miss the teetering steps of unsteady feet as they determinedly attacked the task of walking.

I will miss the beautiful feeling of trust that consumed me as my baby relaxed into my arms while I rocked her and sang "I Am A Child of God". I will miss cradling her impossibly small body and watching it move in rhythm with every breath. I will miss studying her still, peaceful face and feeling that my heart might explode because it is so full.

I won’t miss changing a poopy diaper, only to have to redo it as soon as I put the the wipes away. I won’t miss sleepily stumbling through the dark, tripping over toys, trying to answer my baby’s latest call. I won’t miss the relentless washing of bottles, pacifiers, laundry, and then the dropped pacifiers again, but I will miss holding my baby in my arms. 

So here we are, celebrating our last 1st birthday. Now you will keep growing up, never to stop, no matter how desperately I want you to stop, for just a small moment in time so I can preserve that gummy smile and commit it to memory forever and ever and ever, so I can remember the way you reach for me every time I come into a room because I’m your favorite person in the world, so I can watch you giggle and laugh and do a dance of your own when Bentley turns the music too loud. I don’t want the moments to go away, and like every moment, they must.

So I guess what I want you to know on your birthday is this: You are perfect just the way you are. I love you with all the love I have in my heart. You are a wondrous ending point to our family with your great joy, rainbow eyes, and sweet nature. Happy birthday Karly Rose.

Karly Baby Turns 1!!

Karly Rose - I can't believe it's already been a year since she came into our family. She is the perfect fit, and I can't imagine us without her.  She is such a joy, and is smothered in love and attention from everyone around her.

1 YEAR GROWTH STATS:
 -- Weight: 18lbs 15 oz, 11th percentile
 -- Height: 28 inches long, 31st percentile

-- She still only has four teeth, two on top and two on bottom.
-- She can stand on her own, but she isn't attempting to take any steps yet.
-- She is super chatty and loves to talk. She says: mom, daddy, "Ede" "Benty" "Olli" "Ruby", baby, doggie, cracker, nigh-night, uh-oh, whoa, pretty, thank you, and it seems like there's way more. She just loves to echo us too, so even when she doesn't necessarily know what she is saying, she copies us and says things pretty good.
-- She's a great sleeper, still taking two naps, or one long nap a day, and sleeping great through the night. However, lately she has been throwing her pacifiers out of her bed, which has been causing a bit of trouble when she decides she wants it again.
-- She has the cutest little laugh. She laughs out loud really easier, but also has this funny little giggle that sounds just like Bentley.
-- I never have to worry about her putting stuff into her mouth, which is nice when we are at the park, etc. However, the downside is that she will also not put food into her mouth. I can never get her to try new things, and she hardly has things she likes. I'm still giving her a bottle 2 times a day to try to get some calories in her, but otherwise she is just a little birdie eater. (her pickiness also reminds me of Bentley!)
-- She loves to be outside. It's still a little chilly outside, but we are anxious for warmer weather because I know she will be so happy to wonder around in the backyard. Right now, any time the front or back door opens she moves as quickly as she can to get out.
-- She gives great high-5s, and she blows the sweetest kisses.
--She loves to play peek-a-boo and loves it so much when we chase her. She squeals and laughs and crawls incredibly fast. Her hands slap along the tile as so goes and it's the cutest.
-- Her pretty blue eyes sparkle and it still blows me away how much I can love this little human.

Her birthday was a lot of fun. I had many helpers to make the cupcakes.  All of her siblings wanted to be part of the process because they wanted to make sure they were special for her.  Grandma and grandpa also joined us for the evening as we celebrated our sweet girl.

It took her quite a while to get into her cupcake. She started very slowly, with just a tiny taste on the end of her finger, but eventually she decided it was worth trying and she ended up doing quite a good job finishing it off.

She loved ripping the paper off her presents. She also had lots of help from her loving siblings.

--This cute little animal baby was by far her favorite gift.  She rocks it back and forth and says, "Shhhhh baby. Shhhhh shhhh shhhh."

--In between birthday festivities, there was also a lot of competition going on with the game Bounce Off. It's a favorite around here right now.

--Karly also got her first measurement on the growth board.  She was a little weirded out about it, but she was very patient and trusting of me.  Aside from Eden, she is our smallest 1 year old.  She's so stinkin' cute.

Happy birthday baby Karly Rose.

I'll love you forever, I'll like you for always. As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be.